That standard won’t stop me because I can’t read!

A few years ago I went out drinking with friends. We had a great time, and everything seemed completely normal. We eventually parted ways and I headed home, and somehow there was a creepy atmosphere in the air. I still don’t know what exactly it was. I looked through my apartment and didn’t see anything out of the ordinary, so I basically fell on my bed and passed out.

When I woke up the next morning, a shiver went down my spine as I noticed that during the night, a ghost took a shit in my pants.

I would like the ability to remove other people’s superpowers, please, and thank you